So today is the 4th of February 2010 and I'm sitting in my classroom thinking.....where did the time go? As of this very moment, I only have 47 days 9 hours 49 minutes and 11, 10, 9, 8 seconds until I leave to come back to the states for good. Everytime I looked at my students today I felt sad and somewhat regretful.....Then the dreaded moment came...
They asked me if at the end of the semester I was leaving to go home....for good. For so long, I have been so anxious to get back to the states, to get back to my family, friends, food, familiarity and life. It never really hit me that the students that I have been spending practically every waking moment with, will be out of my life for good.
It is very likely that I will NEVER, EVER see them again. My heart just became very very heavy. For most of my classes, I really didn't teach. I took the time out to let them talk and ask me questions about whatever they wanted and really get their opinions on things. I let them show me their creativity on my whiteboard and teach me Thai words which I have already forgotten, lol...
I've realized that I've been so used to being on the go, constantly moving and never stopping that I have never enjoyed the joy and happiness in the little trivial moments of life.
Although I can never go back and change my time here in Thailand or change the way I taught these kids or how I interacted with them or change how fast I let my life pass me by....I SINCERELY appreciate all of the life lessons that my students have taught me. I just hope that from here on out I will implement them inot my daily life no matter where life may take me.
They have helped to me realize who I am...A FREE SPIRIT...and I know for some of you reading this especially my DAD you have recognized this in me from the beginning.
I truly am a FREE SPIRIT. I don't like doing the norm, I love trying new things, bringing new perspectives into my life, meeting new people, living in different places, constantly learning about different cultures, and doing whatever I feel like doing, learning, saying, reading or wearing.
THANK YOU THAILAND....you have FOUND ME!!!
p.s. do you think its bad if I befriend my students on facebook and skype??? LOL....
