Being.....What does that mean? How do you DO it?
As you can see from many of my previous blog entries, I have been on an emotional, spiritual roller coaster for months now (with typically spending a lot of time and the bottom). Thanks to all the many spiritual teachers I have out there (whether you know it or not), I'm slowly beginning...not to pick myself back up, because that would imply getting better, becoming happier. No I'm slowly beginning to just....BE. I know longer try to be happy, try to be Suzy Sunshine. I'm simply attempting to be present.
Remember my blog "The Cycle of Life" where I discussed how life will always have its ups and downs and that you must see the beauty in it all??? Even though, it clicked for me then, I didn't REALIZE it until now. I'm beginning to appreciate the downs and truly see the beauty in it all. I don't wake up in the mornings saying to myself I'm going to be happy today or that no matter what I'm going to smile. Instead, I wake up and just start doing what I need to do.
I know there will be good days, bad days, good hours, bad hours, good moments and bad moments. I just have to let them come in whatever form they choose. The only thing that I can do in my attempt at being is UNDERSTAND them and how does one understand them by simply BEING. I know confusing right?!?!?! Like what in the world? It's a cycle, a balancing act like all of life is. I will attempt to explain how to understand your emotions by simply being and doing nothing.
During one of my breakdowns over Spring Break, I decided that all of my goals, all of the little things I tried to do to be "better" were not working. I came up with so many different goals and many lists to accomplish these goals. When things got bad, I decided to come up with a positivity wall to help me be happier and make it through the bad times. Now when I use "I," I'm referring to the mind here. My mind was coming up with all these different ways that I could be happy, be positive and avoid the sadness and depression. The mind was, not Soul, not God. And as we all know, the mind is constantly doing things and as such the mind is not who we really are.
Like my spiritual master, Acharya Shree Yogeesh says, "the mind is like the surface of the ocean. It is always rocking, swaying and moving, but it is in the stillness of the deep ocean that we find ourselves, that we find God." For Christians, this would resonate with many verses in the Bible or Apocrypha such as, "The Kingdom of God is inside you, and all around you, not in mansions of wood and stone. Split a piece of wood… and I am there, lift a stone… and you will find me" or "Be still and know that I am God." We, as in our true selves, simply exist. God simply exists. Neither of which is this drone that has to constantly be doing something. God, Soul exists. God, Soul simply ARE. So when needing the answers to life problems or simply needing to get through life's problems, we must imitate our Soul, we must look to God as an example in just existing and being.
So I went outside and just sat there, I didn't engage in any of the thoughts that popped up or actively try to unravel them. Instead, I just let them play out like a movie. Just waiting for them to end and give me their message. At many times, I wasn't even watching them because I was enjoying just being outside listening and feeling the winds rock my body and touch my skin. I'm not sure exactly how long I sat there, but after a while of patience and not engaging, the answers I needed finally came up in the movie. By simply being, by simply sitting outside and being aware of my thoughts without engaging in them, the answers came.
I wasn't trying to DO anything and I was prepared to just sit there without anything coming to me and enjoy just sitting outside without thinking or doing anything. So out of that session, one of my answers was awareness. I won't go into detail about awareness here, rather you can check out the blog that I dedicated completely to it. Awareness was what I did, by not engaging and just watching. Just watching and being aware will allow for me to understand, feel and find the source of my emotions. I don't have to actively, ask myself "why am I mad?" "who made me mad?" "where is this coming from?" "how do I stop it?" Instead, I can simply be and be aware and the answers to all of those questions that I was forcefully asking myself will be answered from being.
So now we have successfully, I hope, progressed from knowing how to understand emotions from just being and being aware to "how do we be?" This is the most basic yet most challenging concept....MEDITATION!
As you can see from many of my previous blog entries, I have been on an emotional, spiritual roller coaster for months now (with typically spending a lot of time and the bottom). Thanks to all the many spiritual teachers I have out there (whether you know it or not), I'm slowly beginning...not to pick myself back up, because that would imply getting better, becoming happier. No I'm slowly beginning to just....BE. I know longer try to be happy, try to be Suzy Sunshine. I'm simply attempting to be present.
Remember my blog "The Cycle of Life" where I discussed how life will always have its ups and downs and that you must see the beauty in it all??? Even though, it clicked for me then, I didn't REALIZE it until now. I'm beginning to appreciate the downs and truly see the beauty in it all. I don't wake up in the mornings saying to myself I'm going to be happy today or that no matter what I'm going to smile. Instead, I wake up and just start doing what I need to do.
I know there will be good days, bad days, good hours, bad hours, good moments and bad moments. I just have to let them come in whatever form they choose. The only thing that I can do in my attempt at being is UNDERSTAND them and how does one understand them by simply BEING. I know confusing right?!?!?! Like what in the world? It's a cycle, a balancing act like all of life is. I will attempt to explain how to understand your emotions by simply being and doing nothing.
During one of my breakdowns over Spring Break, I decided that all of my goals, all of the little things I tried to do to be "better" were not working. I came up with so many different goals and many lists to accomplish these goals. When things got bad, I decided to come up with a positivity wall to help me be happier and make it through the bad times. Now when I use "I," I'm referring to the mind here. My mind was coming up with all these different ways that I could be happy, be positive and avoid the sadness and depression. The mind was, not Soul, not God. And as we all know, the mind is constantly doing things and as such the mind is not who we really are.
Like my spiritual master, Acharya Shree Yogeesh says, "the mind is like the surface of the ocean. It is always rocking, swaying and moving, but it is in the stillness of the deep ocean that we find ourselves, that we find God." For Christians, this would resonate with many verses in the Bible or Apocrypha such as, "The Kingdom of God is inside you, and all around you, not in mansions of wood and stone. Split a piece of wood… and I am there, lift a stone… and you will find me" or "Be still and know that I am God." We, as in our true selves, simply exist. God simply exists. Neither of which is this drone that has to constantly be doing something. God, Soul exists. God, Soul simply ARE. So when needing the answers to life problems or simply needing to get through life's problems, we must imitate our Soul, we must look to God as an example in just existing and being.
So I went outside and just sat there, I didn't engage in any of the thoughts that popped up or actively try to unravel them. Instead, I just let them play out like a movie. Just waiting for them to end and give me their message. At many times, I wasn't even watching them because I was enjoying just being outside listening and feeling the winds rock my body and touch my skin. I'm not sure exactly how long I sat there, but after a while of patience and not engaging, the answers I needed finally came up in the movie. By simply being, by simply sitting outside and being aware of my thoughts without engaging in them, the answers came.
I wasn't trying to DO anything and I was prepared to just sit there without anything coming to me and enjoy just sitting outside without thinking or doing anything. So out of that session, one of my answers was awareness. I won't go into detail about awareness here, rather you can check out the blog that I dedicated completely to it. Awareness was what I did, by not engaging and just watching. Just watching and being aware will allow for me to understand, feel and find the source of my emotions. I don't have to actively, ask myself "why am I mad?" "who made me mad?" "where is this coming from?" "how do I stop it?" Instead, I can simply be and be aware and the answers to all of those questions that I was forcefully asking myself will be answered from being.
So now we have successfully, I hope, progressed from knowing how to understand emotions from just being and being aware to "how do we be?" This is the most basic yet most challenging concept....MEDITATION!
Now for many the special place is appealing and is the only way to get meditation in during our busy lives. I do have a "special place" for meditation and all my sadhana, but for me, it is not my special place that permits me to go deeper, but the simple act of sitting that allows me to do that. It's even better for me when I can sit outside in the sun surrounded by nature and just be. With that, I think we've covered it all. So go out and find out what is the best activity or way that you can just be for just a few minutes a day. Whether it is writing, walking, painting, singing, or just sitting, the sooner you are able to find what truly allows you to just be in the midst of your "doing" day, you can begin to live in the present moment.
Simple