Why do I want to be so mean to those who don't necessarily deserve it? I say necessarily because no one deserves any harm to come to them from another human being. But why can't I help wanting to bad mouth certain individuals? Or make them realize their "faults" in a harmful way?
I feel like one of the worst people in the world for admitting this, but I need a way to let my emotions out. I can't keep suppressing thinking that I've dealth with them when I really haven't.
I have soooooo much anger pent up inside of me. Especially lately. I'm quick to get irritated and annoyed. Quick to want to yell and catch an attitude and quick to revert back to Nichollette and just start cutting people out instead of trying to work things out.
I feel like exploding, like going off on the entire world and letting it know how I feel. I know some may be wondering what is going on? Where is this coming from? And honestly, I don't know. I thought that I had been doing so well with being sweet, understanding and loving, but lately that has not been doing the trick.
I've been judgmental, critical, and just flat out mean....at least on the inside.
You know when you've just shaken a coke bottle and you begin to open it and suddenly realize that you had shaken it so you stop, but a little coke fizzes out anyway??? That's what just happen to me tonight. I slightly went off on one of my officemates and it felt good...and its sad to say I wanted to say even more and more and more....but luckily I walked away before I could get even more ashamed of myself....
What is going on? I'm not myself anymore and I don't know how to stop it or if I even can....I just want to go away...I feel like I need to go away for a while by myself....no phone, no computer, no internet, not even my dog and just be with myself for a really long while...
I feel like one of the worst people in the world for admitting this, but I need a way to let my emotions out. I can't keep suppressing thinking that I've dealth with them when I really haven't.
I have soooooo much anger pent up inside of me. Especially lately. I'm quick to get irritated and annoyed. Quick to want to yell and catch an attitude and quick to revert back to Nichollette and just start cutting people out instead of trying to work things out.
I feel like exploding, like going off on the entire world and letting it know how I feel. I know some may be wondering what is going on? Where is this coming from? And honestly, I don't know. I thought that I had been doing so well with being sweet, understanding and loving, but lately that has not been doing the trick.
I've been judgmental, critical, and just flat out mean....at least on the inside.
You know when you've just shaken a coke bottle and you begin to open it and suddenly realize that you had shaken it so you stop, but a little coke fizzes out anyway??? That's what just happen to me tonight. I slightly went off on one of my officemates and it felt good...and its sad to say I wanted to say even more and more and more....but luckily I walked away before I could get even more ashamed of myself....What is going on? I'm not myself anymore and I don't know how to stop it or if I even can....I just want to go away...I feel like I need to go away for a while by myself....no phone, no computer, no internet, not even my dog and just be with myself for a really long while...
